Chapter 2, Discipline and Remorse
***
“I cannot understand why, why we follow you, we obey. We preach it, we know it to be what is needed. So why does it feel like so many no longer care if the words we say matter? Why does life these days feel different than the days that Mother teaches? Oh Great Father, Grant us yet another day…”
***
Year of Wrath 1231, Season of Heat, D.42
We all go through it eventually, a rite of passage for the clan. The children are given the chance to prove themselves, to prove they listened to the lessons taught. Mine, I keep being told, was strange, that I should have died for what I did. I still remember it mostly, a bright morning, handed only a knife as long as my forearm.
Well over a decade had passed and I still remembered the things that stalked the forest in the night. Eyes that moved in the shadows, shadows that moved with no light, evil things that howled in the night as they killed those they hunted. I didn’t sleep the first night, away from Mama and the Clan for the first time. I thought I’d have shaken the leaves from the branches with my own fear.
Though many parts of my trial were hazy, I remember dropping down on that toothy elk. It was my only chance, it was hunting me, not the other way around. Its howls of pain threatened to burst my eardrums, I still managed to kill it and the snail I wanted to hunt. The lessons the others drilled into me over countless months kicked in, how it stuck itself on a tree from the spear I got into its leg.
Lucky me, when I dropped back down onto it from the trees I landed that knife into its spine. The exhaustion was the worst part, tired too tired to be scared anymore. That cart I stole from a farm helped a lot, but I brought back to the village a bounty they never expected from me. I brought back that snail, three times my height as a little girl. The hunters were far more impressed that I downed one of the monsters in the wood, I was always their favorite after that. Yorm called me his little hunter, Ma couldn’t stop from praising me peppering my dirty blood smeared face with kisses.
My ears twitched at the sound of a breaking stick off in the distance. My memory evaporating before my eyes, pulled out of the daydream with the reminder that I was here. Here in reality, here in the forest. I had ditched Hob to practice with the Veteran Raiders, he had gotten even more of a foul mood after we got back to the village the first day. I just wanted to be away from him and his negativity for a while.
Despite Ma getting on in years, she still managed to swing her way up the tree I was sitting in, using that staff of hers like a hook. That split dress the High Priestess of the clan wore, apparently let you move quite a bit. I had never realized, I hadn’t seen her try anything like this since I was child, when she used to play with me. “So what brings the daughter of the clan so far away from her tasks?” She said, handing me a chunk of bread from somewhere hidden in billowing sleeves. She always seemed to show up with just the thing before even I knew it. As she handed it to me, my stomach decided to make itself known, making her laugh.
“I wanted to be away from the anchor.” I whined between bites.
Mother being Mother frowned at me. “You shouldn’t talk about Hob like that. We all know he’s been a handful lately, but do not talk down about the others of the Clan. You know that.”
Throwing my hands in the air, the sheath of the knife knocked against the branch with each emphasis I made. “How can I not?! He’s been nothing but a jackass this entire time? The Chief picked me to lead the Raiders and not him, so why isn’t he made at Yorm and why at me? Everyone else seems to be more than happy with me, I’m keeping them alive by making them practice, all the planning I put into each hit is meant to keep them out of the line of fire. So why is he saying hurtful things, trying to undermine me constantly. Hell, Ma. I asked if Cori and Knoll would go rough on him just to prove he isn’t the best fighter we have!” I had to take a breath, Kari twirling her finger at me so she could fix something with my braid.
“He’s acting out because you make him feel small.” She said, pulling at my hair, slowly undoing the work she had done that morning. “I mean look at you, you are one of the prettiest girls in the Clan, you are a capable fighter, you have quickly proven yourself as a wonderful leader. He knows his outbursts only make him look weak, but he's never had a good management of his anger and you know that.”
“You’re only saying that because I’m your daughter.” I pouted, crossing my arms.
“You are all my children, all the ones from past mistakes are my children. I raised all of you even if you are not my blood. By Bhal’s immense patience do I learn from, I seek to emulate his greatness as you should. You should be just a bit more patient with him, I’ve taught you enough scripture for you to know that already.” She dropped into her Priestess voice without missing a beat, soft as moss yet stern and wise.
“I really am trying Ma.” I sighed.
“Tell me how your first few weeks of your role in the clan now.” She said, changing subjects.
While she fussed with my hair, I began. “We’ve hit traveler after traveler, more or less trying my tactics. Hold ups, surprising them, no blood. I haven’t gotten anyone killed, none of my boys have died. For that matter, I haven't gotten any of them injured either.”
“I appreciate that, we all do. It’s quite a bit quieter when I only have two groups coming back that I need to heal. You make me proud to hear that your tactics are working well.” I allowed myself to smile at her praise.
“A few of them wanted to fight a heavily armored cart with a dozen or so mercenaries. Yvet had seen them coming a few days before they entered our territory, told me about it. We spent some time stalking them, setting up a place to ambush them. They put up a good fight a week or so back. I tried to get them to agree to the standard terms, just hand me what they could fit in a box. But, oh, no. One of them wanted to be brave.” I leaned back to rest against her, even as her fingers worked the knots out of my hair.
“Even with a knife to his throat he charged me, I back stepped and surprisingly Hob stepped in his way. The mercenary stabbed at him with his spear, but Hob swatted it aside with the tip of his, and swept the legs out under the man. Hob on the back spin with his spear knocked the mercenary's head to the ground with a grunt. He raised the tip of the spear to push it into the man's chest and I told him to stop. He just looked at me, tip barely an inch away from the unconscious man's chest.”
“Let me guess, he killed the poor human anyway?” Soberly she spoke.
“It was a tense moment, but he walked away from the fallen man. I could hear him grumbling, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. The rest of the travelers submitted, and we got a few boxes of loot for our trouble. Boxes full of food and leather, we could do quite a bit with that. I saw the other boys talk to him, he stormed off after that.”
“Why would they give you more, when you only asked for one box?” Ma asked.
“Apparently, I’ve been speaking common a lot more. I speak it around the boys more and more and I don’t even notice. I shouted my order to Hob, and they thanked me for sparing his life. Though I thought it was a little odd, we still took their things, but they thanked me for not killing one of them?”
“They have families and lives as well. Put in a dangerous situation, you’d be happy with as many mercies as well.”
“You sound like Ghet.” I said, looking up at her. The canyons in her aged face, the wrinkles around her eyes.
“He has a point about many things, Darling. I cannot help but agree with a few of them. Many of the other Veteran Raiders are also feeling the same way too, which.” She bopped my nose before speaking again, “Why you are becoming very popular. The older raiders, those in the village, are seeing you do things differently. It’s a breath of fresh air.”
We were silent for a long moment, enjoying each other’s presence. She quietly weaved my braid back together while I leaned against her. The sound of the leaves as the wind passed through them, the chatter of some critter running through the canopy. She always knew how to take my mind off things.
“The Chief was pleased, and was even happier that Hob listened to me. He also thinks Hob is going to challenge me, that I should prove to him that I was the raid leader. He wanted me to know, so I wouldn't be caught off guard when he did. If Hob challenges me and loses, he would be treated harshly.” I spoke softly, I too didn’t want to hear the words. But what Ghet told me before, well it seemed that he was right.
She stopped, breathing a heavy sigh. I felt her shoulders slump in disappointment, “Yorm is a traditionalist when it came to our customs. That if you two wanted to bring each other down, you’d better be able to prove it. I’m not nervous for you, but confident. Let Hob challenge you, but as much as he is a son to me as you my daughter, I don’t think he’d be able to beat you.”
She finished the tight braid, weaving the heavy iron bead that Yorm gave me in the tail. Without a word she swung down from the branch, walking back to the village. She believed in me then, she was confident that I would be able to solidify my place. A cold breeze cut through the branches whipping a few stray hairs in my eyes.
Hopping down, I thought back to Ghet is teaching me to fight better with my knife. I've landed a few cuts on him, and we’d help bandage each other up after each lesson. The lessons Mother gave me about medicine comIng in handy these days. I enjoyed my time with him like this, even dragged Hob and Til into the lessons when they were around. I keep telling them that it'll be good for them as we can all get better at using our weapons. Ghet insisting that we always use sharp edges, says a healthy dose of fear adds to the "getting good" process.
He's never told me how old he is, he gets winded easier than the other boys, complaining of his wrists aching. He is a little slower too, though he makes up for this in patients. He likes to block, feint, and draw you in to open your guard. He makes good use of the few strikes he can get in. He keeps telling me, it's easier to use your opponent's force against them, you don't have to work as hard then. He has made his point plenty of times, all the boys have a hard time against him, despite his age.
The sun was hot in the middle of the day, right in the middle of the Season of Heat. Perfect for catching travelers when they were resting under the shade of the trees. Yvet and I spotted a few up on the hills by the side of the road. Started making our way over to them, slowly, keeping the spears low, footsteps quiet. Told the boys to hold weapons to themselves so they didn’t rustle. The only thing anyone could hear was the wind through the leaves of the tree the travelers were sitting under.
We snuck up on them, surprised them. They were all in scaled armor, still seemed shiny, like they never got to use it for what it was for. They also all had pistols, though lucky us, they were sleeping or not paying attention. Time to change that. Ghet, til and Ysry crept up on them, pulling the guns from their holsters just as we descended.
Twelve spears pointed at them, encircling them like a thorn ridden wall. The hold up went flawlessly, we were almost finished getting what we could from them, when one of them whipped out a saber and slashed at me. My breath caught one blink and I’d have missed it, I parried it away with the haft of the spear, and swept the human's legs out. He swung at my thigh as he fell and managed to open a shallow cut. Blood started to flow down my leg already pooling below my foot.
I heard myself hiss from the sharp burn of the cut, like I was the onlooker not the one in danger. I whipped the flat of the spear tip at his head and put him down, knocking him out cold. A large welt was already swelling on the side of his head. I kicked the saber away from him, and ripped part of his shirt off and used it as a bandage on my leg. I told the rest of the humans to give us what we asked for and they'd be free to leave. They dropped their weapons and a bag of food and took off, leaving the unconscious guy behind.
I suppose they weren't particularly bothered to potentially leave their friend to die, though, these humans were always strange to me. Some were steadfast and resolute with us, some were outright cowards like these were. Personally I preferred the cowards, they left my boys with a better chance of getting home.
My leg was starting to shake, the cut burning like someone with a hot iron was having a bit too much fun, but that didn't really seem to do it justice somehow. “Sharp sword, I think I will try and keep it.” I thought to myself.
Hob came up to me just as the rest had grabbed what the travelers had dropped, and pushed me. "What was that?" He yelled at me, "He tried to kill you and you left him alive?! Make an example of this human about what happens to them when they attack the Clan!" Well he certainly seemed to think this was going to help. He was red in the face, apparently not having calmed down at all.
"What would be the point? I eliminated him as a threat. What would be the good in killing him, other than to piss off the humans in the city?" I told him, caution in my voice for him not to continue. "I have told you several dozen times at this point why we shouldn't kill everyone we come across."
"Why are you so soft? Why do you show such mercy? Why are you too weak to give hard judgement?!" Hob yelled back. He gripped his spear hard enough that his knuckles were turning pale, he also couldn't stop clenching his jaw. Looked like he was trying to chew something resilient.
"You mean how your father was! Hob, your father did things that way, and got himself killed by the humans. Ghet's father did that. Til's father did that. My mother did that.” In the corner of my eye I saw Ghet turned away, And you know? They all died because of their ways. The humans hunted them down, and slaughtered them!" I shoved him back, he was getting too in my face. His eyes were already getting bloodshot. "Why can't you ever just think about what is best for the Clan instead of trying to prove yourself in foolish ways?"
Hob swung his spear at me in a wide arc aiming at my already cut leg. I jumped painfully back, landed hard and went to a knee. He didn't let up and lunged at me, spear tip aimed for my leg. I dodged by leaning back and felt the spear tip graze my chest, another shallow cut. I slapped the tip away from me and grabbed the shaft and pulled.
Several of the others barked at him to stop this. I felt something in my voice, I didn’t understand it, but I thought my voice cleared the dust out of our little sparing ring. “No! He wants to fight, then fine. I’m tired of this.”
His eyes grew wide and struggled to regain control of the spear. I twisted it so that he had to over compensate. Hob fell off balance and stumbled a few paces forward, sucker punched him under the chin from my position. I ran my hands up to where he held the haft, and twisted. Spear flew away impaling itself in a tree that ringed the area as he had let go of it. I drew my knife and got painfully to my feet, kicked at his knee. He grunted as I connected and backed away.
I pushed forward and slashed at his arm. "You want me to pass harsh judgement huh?!" I screamed at him. A cold felt in the air. "How dare you try and degrade my leadership. How dare you try and degrade me! Who are you Hob?, we shouldn't be fighting, but here you are wanting to be foolish again!" Yvet and Til looked ready to join the fight, it was not done to try and bring someone from the Clan down.
I punched him square in the jaw with my knife hand as he gasped from the pain in his arm. I think I knocked a tooth loose. "You want me to make an example of someone?! Fine let's start with you."
“You want to be Raid Leader so bad, then take it from me.” The rest of the raiding party fanned out to watch the fight. Hob recovered from my punch before I could back my face away and back handed me, half blinding me from the force of the strike. Stars popped in my vision as I saw him get back in stance and draw his knife. He breathed out and rushed forward, swiped at my forearm, I adjusted slightly and caught his knife flat with the back of my arm just like Ghet taught us. I grabbed his hand and pushed out, slashed the inside of his wrist, he started bleeding heavily, swinging forward and elbowing me in the chest.
He knocked me back, I knew he was stronger than the others but enough to actually slide me back from a hit? I still had stars popping in my eyes, tried to shake my head to force them away and lunged forward. I ducked down as he threw another punch and slashed his leg on the way down. He yelped and grabbed my hand and twisted the knife out of it. "You shouldn't be a leader, you are too weak to! You let potential enemies leave the battlefield. The fewer humans there are, the less threat they are to us! Your kindness leaves weapons in the hands of those who want to kill us!" He barked at me. "You sit there and preach to us all the time about that nonsense. The Clan is safer with fewer humans, not your kindness to them!"
I slackened pulling him down with my dead weight in his grip, he wasn't expecting it. He hit the ground with a huff, I grabbed his knife and disarmed him. Getting back to my feet first, and putting him in a Nelson, put pressure against his shoulder. "You know" I shook my head to try and clear it again "I leave enemies on the battlefield, because it's safer." I felt him squirm from under me, he turned his face to look at me.
"How is leaving them alive better, safer?" He spoke with a mouth half full of dirt. A tinge of hate in his eyes.
"We are hunted because we rob, steal and murder. You never want to go on scouting runs with me." I looked at the rest of the raiders around me "None of you do! You don't know the way the humans in the City talk about us. You know what, the stealing, the hold ups isn't what they are talking about. There are bandits on every road, they talk about how all the time, its the killing. That THEIR boys never make it home!" I screamed at them. Several of them looked away. Ghet cocking his head, a strange look of pride on his face.
Hob pushed himself up, breaking my Nelson on him. He knocked me to the ground and grabbed me by my shirt. He didn't really care that he was exposing quite a bit of me to everyone by doing so, only making the slash in my vest worse. "What is your point?" he spat. "So we kill them, my point stands. The fewer fighters they have the better."
I felt my face get hot, a very cool breeze playing across my chest, and I kicked his legs out from under him and spat right back "Think about it dumbass" The vest was beyond fixing, I would just have to deal with giving the boys a show, ripping the rest of it off. It would only get in the way as it was. "What do they take us for, what do they retaliate about? What do they actually care about? That we kill their sons and daughters on our raids. They send the City Watch out when the killings get too numerous! The less killing we do, the less chance we have of the Watch showing up with better numbers, better gear, and better trained men."
He got to his feet quickly, and tried to tackle me. Turning a little, I pushed him away so that he was off balance again. His momentum kept him going forward. Before he turned back to me, I swiped his legs out from under him again. Apparently he just got dumber when he was mad "We aren't killing their fighters, we are killing merchants, travelers, and wayward souls. Their fighters are still in the City, just waiting to be commanded to fight. We aren't making them any weaker, just pissing them off" My voice was starting to get hoarse from this.
He got back up and swung at me one more time. We were right next to where I dumped his spear, still wiggling in the tree. Ducking under his punch and grabbing it. "Hob, how did your father die? He killed someone, and when the raiding crew attacked the Watch, tracking them. They died. Your Da' died fighting a fight he couldn't win because he thought the same thing you do now" He swung at me and tried to grab my spear.
I pirouetted and used the momentum to swing the spear shaft at his head and connected, hard. Hard enough to splinter the shaft and knock Hob out cold, ears started bleeding from the force of the hit. "You know Hob, I spare them, I don't let you guys get into positions that you can be killed from. Why do you think I always tell you all to get behind them? Grab them from behind. Why do you think I want everyone using spears on the initial assault. It keeps you all out of reach, or not in a position they can stab you from!" Hob grunted on the ground. I fell to one knee and felt my head get dizzy. I bled through the makeshift bandage on my leg. There was a long pause, as my head started to clear again.
"I can't really believe he challenged you. The Chief is going to rip him apart for that." Ghet whispered as he got his wits back. I knew what he was talking about though, the Clan did not try to bring each other down. Well, at least that is what the Karialways kept saying, or maybe he was talking about the fact that I was losing blood, shirtless and almost ready to pass out myself.
Ghet walked over and handed me a few bandages, a few others came over and helped me bandage my cheek and chest, I could feel my eye starting to swell. Yvet took his shirt off and handed it to me, maybe Mother was right. I felt all of them staring at me, half naked in front of them. Maybe if Yvet could just keep his eyes off me for a moment. I laughed inwardly, “Maybe I am pretty.”
"What about Hob?" Ghet asked me, handing over a flask of water, I took a few gulps out of it. I thought for a moment, what were we going to do with him.
Grabbing the last few bandages from the others, hobbled over to Hob and began wrapping his leg where I slashed him. After a moment, the others walked over to join me. Ghet started bandaging his wrist, we turned him on his side so he could puke up the blood in his mouth. "We won't leave him here, I'm furious with him" I absently adjusted my shirt "But..." Ghet put his hand on my shoulder and hugged me.
"Maybe you could leave that part for Hob's sake. He wasn't thinking." He whispered to me in his embrace, lightly tugging my shirt. Maybe he was right, I relaxed a bit and broke the hug, smiling at him, and he nodded.
After all said and done we headed back to the Clan. To say Mother was furious, a few of the other clan women fussed about my swollen eye, I brushed them off. Though she kept quiet about it, she did wring out the whole story of it all. The commotion was enough at the entrance to the caves that Chief came to see what was going on. The Clan parted for the Chief, a somber quiet coming over them.
Hob was back on his feet, his blood soaked through his bandages and the Priestess was busy replacing them when he showed up. I thought I was falling before I realized Yorm had grabbed me by the back of the collar and dragged me over to Hob. He tossed me next to him, reminded right then and there just how strong the Father of the Clan was.
"What. Happened. How many did we lose?" He asked in a voice full of anger and solemn acceptance. His fists were shaking, and his ears were twitching.
Me and Hob both started talking at once, and Kari told us both to quiet down. "Ilgor, sweet heart, tell us what happened." So I did. The fight, the argument. Hobs misguided ideology, all of it. The Chief was growing angrier as the words came out of my mouth, Mother looked agitated, and tired.
“At least didn't leave without getting some loot.” I tried to smooth it out, but the damage was done. I regretted what happened next, despite my fury with him, Hob didn’t deserve the brunt of Yorm’s fury. But, the Chief ignored my addition.
"Hob," Yorm spoke softly, dangerously. His eyes were bloodshot now, then he grabbed him by the neck and lifted him off his feet. "You challenged Ilgor, Lost. You couldn't prove you were a better leader in front of the crew no less!” He dropped his voice low, a sound I didn’t think he could make. “You are weak, Hob. I am disappointed, you only bring shame to the name of Bhal and his rule. No one brings down the others without due cause. You couldn't prove you were a superior fighter than her, and you didn't convince me or any of your crew with your anger. Why did you not go through me first? Why did you challenge Ilgor without my approval? Why did you disobey me? How dare you disrespect one of the women of the Clan, I see that damned shirt, she wore a vest on the way out this morning! You think I didn’t notice Yvet came back without one! I don't care how the fight went, you should be ashamed, Hob! You are insubordinate, hot headed and ill fit to lead..." He pointed at me, and his face softened a little. "You did well, Bhal be praised"
He turned his face back to Hob who was squirming in his iron grip, and then threw him against the rock wall of the bluff, out cold again. His blood soaking the ground beneath him, the Mother and several others shot Yorm a withering gaze before rushing over to him and began treating his cuts again. She looked up at the Chief again, anger in her eyes. Words would be had between Mother and Father today, they would never let us hear this though, we all knew though. It seemed unfair to me, to see the Chief do the same thing to Hob, as he tried with me. Something Ghet said dawned on me, “the games they play”.
You know, I understand where Hob is coming from. I get it, I felt that way too, until I started eavesdropping on the humans. Something had to change something, I thought that maybe this way of gaining resources would have better chances at keeping the clan alive. Keep the humans off our backs if we did less killing, maybe someday, we wouldn’t need to do this at all…
The Chief walked over to me and handed me the saber the human slashed my leg with. It was as tall as I was, and weighted as much as two of our spears. "Take it, Ilgor. You have earned your right as raid leader, take this as a symbol of my confidence in you." He walked away, A small crowd of Raiders lifted Hob for Ma and brought him into the caves.
The saber was beautiful, now that I got to look at it more. The little cup guard was carved in steel. Full of vines and leaves with a tree and sun motif in its corner. The blade itself looked like it had little waves in the metal, it was sturdy. I would really have to build my strength to wield it with any competence though. I'd keep it in the cave next to my bedroll until then. I didn't want to bring it on raids, not until my shoulders could hold it up anyway.
***
The travelers returned to where they were attacked by the goblins. Wanting to try and see if their friend was still alive. They found him, weaponless, and he didn't have boots, but very much alive. "What happened, Ricco?" The man said to him climbing the last few steps up the hill.
“I was out for a while, but I woke up to something weird. The goblins just left me alone, well clearly not totally alone. I woke up to two of them fighting. It was insane, They looked like they were arguing. Couldn't understand a damn thing though. Sounded like crows cawing at each other. But, they just ignored me. That fight though, I think we ought to tell the City they are a bit more skilled than they look. Their leader, the one who was doing all the talking, I guess it was female..." Ricco trailed off,
"It's okay, we can go, looks like they're gone, let's get back to City." The other man said, extending his hand to Ricco.
"I don't know, their fight seemed like it was something bigger, y'know? I don't know how to explain it. It just felt like I watched something important. Besides, those little vermin apparently have some sympathy in them. They started bandaging each other up after the fight was over, helped the beaten guy back up and they all walked off together." Ricco continued, his eyes distant. Ricco watched the wind blow across the grassy field, and rustle the leaves in the tree.
"You think this information would be worth something?" The man asked, and it seemed that Ricco had seen something after all he thought.
"Maybe, but, I don't know.", Ricco murmured.
"Who won?" The man asked Ricco.
"The girl, I mean the one who was doing all the talking. Seemed like they were all surprised about it. Though, I don't know, maybe they were surprised at something else. The rest of them just seemed shocked in general. Just wish I knew what they were talking about."
The man laughed and said "You have all the luck, you get your ass beat from that clumsy swing, you live to tell the tale, and you get to see the goblins not be monsters.” He clasped Ricco by the shoulder “Come on, let's go have a few at Gables. Might be worth something there." Still laughing, the man pulled Ricco up by the arm, and they walked away toward the City.
***
Year of Wrath 1231, Season of Heat, D.44
I woke back up some time later. The sun had set, the last rays of light making their way into the cave, as the nightly fires were just being lit. The wind made its way into our home, pushing the smoke out through the holes in the cave. Pushing myself up off the bedroll and turned my head and saw that Ilgor was sitting besides me. Not looking at me, but clearly hearing me wake up. There was an uncomfortably long pause, then she sighed, like she had been here for a while.
"Why would I leave you alive, why did I leave a potential enemy on the battlefield, Hob?" Her voice was low and soft. "You are the same thing, a potential enemy now, will you follow me, or stand in my way? I don't know." She put her hand on mine, I flinched a little at it. "I hope you understand my point, I hope you don't resent me." She had a serious face, like she was trying to see into me.
I looked away, and grunted. But, didn't push her hand off mine. There was another long uncomfortable pause as she never stopped staring at me. She chuckled in that sing-song way of hers "You’re the one who wanted an example." She got up and left the cave, her long braid swinging as she walked.
I nearly felt my heart stop as the next voice spoke right behind me. Deep, a life full of strife evident by the sound alone. “You were a damned fool, boy.” Though I knew it well, Knoll’s gravelly voice was still a striking thing to hear.
“After hearing about your fight, as well as a few… misplaced strikes. You’re lucky she didn’t kill you for that.” I heard him take off his heavy gauntlets, metal jangling as I turned in the bedroll to look at him.
“That wasn’t intentional.” I said, thinking back to her ripping that torn fabric off her.
“Sure.” He was entirely unconvinced, as he came back with a bowl of hot broth and handed it to me. “So why not apologize? She gave you the perfect opportunity right there, she gave you the opportunity to discuss it. That bit about leaving enemies on the battlefield.” He whacked the top of my head hard with a spoon before handing it to me.”
“She clearly doesn’t want you as an enemy. She seems more than ready to accept you back in the raider.” He leaned in close so the others of the Family watching wouldn’t hear. “Oh, by the way, while you were out. Yorm decided for Ilgor to decide you are unfit to be a raider, until you prove otherwise.”
“WHAT!” That got more attention than I wanted, hushing my voice before continuing, angrier than before. “How am I supposed to prove that?”
“Could have taken the hint she gave you, instead of pouting like a child.” He said leaning down to me. “By the way, you ever do that again to her or any of the other women of the Clan because you can’t control your fury, you got off easy with what Yorm did.” He cracked his knuckles as he rose and walked out of the cave, his bulky frame blotted out the sunset.
“Fan-fucking-tastic, Hob. Wonderful” A certain amount of self loathing boiling in my mind as I laid back down. The cut to my leg still painful, it hurts to put much pressure on it to even sit up for long. Ilgor swam through my mind, I wanted to acknowledge I lost, I was wrong for jumping the chain of command, but damn could I not let myself say I was wrong… With Knoll watching, I didn’t know the Veteran fighters were on her side. I figured Cori might be, but Knoll? One of the few of the clan I was sure I had no chance of winning in a fight with.
The fires in the cave grew brighter as the sun sank over the mountains to the west of the caves. Left me plenty of time to sit and think.
